Jerks

Dear Jerks,

You're welcome for the cupcakes. Not that you said "thank you." Or even really acknowledged the reason for them in the first place. Her name is Kit, btw. She's worked here longer than almost all of you, and I have not yet quite figured out how we will continue to operate without her assistance.

But you're welcome for the cupcakes.

Love,
Kate

p.s. Note that those who stayed and played games and actually acknowledged Kit's last day are excluded from the "jerk" label.

Dear Cancer, Part II

Dear Cancer,

Take that, bitch!

Regards,
Kate

Dear Chicago

Dear Everyone in Chicago,

If you are wearing a Blackhawks jersey this week, you should be subjected to sponaneous pop quizzes on the street. If you cannot, at any given moment, not only name three current players on the team, but also at least one player from three years ago (thanks, Mike, for that suggestion), then you should be punched in the face and forced to replace your Blackhawks jersey with a tshirt that says, "I am a bandwagony poser."

Love,
Kate